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Lena Dunham

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Loud, white liberal with a pixie cut
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Megan Rapinoe (ibid)
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We know you’re mad about this, but it’s true
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Eve (from the Bible, not WALL-E)

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Had hella plants, but abandoned them
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Little Bo-Peep (from Disney/Pixar’s 1995 Toy Story)

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So coquette!
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Cruella De Vil

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Dyed hair with a quasi mullet, thinks she’s gonna get all the bitches
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Rapunzel

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Got the Wellesley chop
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Dolores Umbridge

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She rocks a pants suit
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Took over the whole-ass ministry of magic #slay
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Amelia Earhart

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Idk why, but it just feels right
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Would prob get lost trying to catch the commuter rail
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Mindy Kaling

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This isn’t a joke lol, I actually did think she went here
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Lin Manuel Miranda

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Oh wait, never mind, that’s Wesleyan
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That one dumbass in my math class’ mom

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She has to have been a legacy admit